Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
