butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
