He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
