Moan for me like Helen Keller
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
