5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize