There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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