K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
