It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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