Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
