So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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