I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
