Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
