god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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