Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I just had sex on a roof
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize
