That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize
