i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
