thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I heard we made out
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
