Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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