I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
