I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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