Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
