Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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