i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
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