porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
