I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
