break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He felt like a one man threesome
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
