and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
