I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
