lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
