I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Randomize
