idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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