The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
