Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
