i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize