Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
