I am puke
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
