I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
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