Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself