Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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