so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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