Sponge bath it is.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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