You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
