everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
