Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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