Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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