I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
