Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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