I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
