I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
His hands were made for my vagina.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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