i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
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