you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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