He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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